Celebrities writing badly

Antigone is about a girl who looses [sic] her brother during a war.

Indeed.

For more about what an education steeped in the classics can yield, read this listing at Christie's. Yes, the above sliver of juvenilia represents one of one hundred seventy personal items Britney Spears donated to an on-line auction in aid of her eponymous Foundation. Folks, her English teacher wept. (Thanks, CED.)

And in "No Starlet Left Behind, Not Even Lindsay Lohan," we find this sample:

If not only my heart but the heart of Mr. Altman's wife and family and many fellow actors/artists that admire him for his work and love him for making people laugh whenever and however he could.

Oh. My. Goodness.

Did you know Lohan was (*shhh*) homeschooled? For a while, anyway. (Thanks, M.)

Added a little later: Speaking of homeschooling and celebrities (we were, weren't we?)... did you know Will Smith home educates his children? From the November 21 "Get Buzzed" column in Louisville Kentucky's The Courier-Journal:

Will Smith says he and his wife, Jada Pinkett Smith, homeschool their kids because “traditional education is based on facts and figures and passing tests — not on a comprehension of the material and its application to your life.”

In the December issue of Reader’s Digest, Smith, 38, says, “Jada and I homeschool our children because the date of the Boston Tea Party does not matter.”

The “Hitch” star also says he can learn anything he wants to, so long as the instructions are in a book. “Give me the book, and I do not need somebody to stand up in front of the class,” says Smith.

Aside from the whole "date of the Boston Tea Party does not matter" business, I find myself -- gosh, dare I admit this? -- rather agreeing with Smith.

Heh, heh, heh.